The Mild January

After a five week hiatus, I once again have a busy schedule and hold many responsibilities. Tuesday brought a reunion of the survivors of Statistics for Biologists I. The classroom buzzed with chatter before our instructor welcomed us back; there was a sense of familiarity there, filled with friends.

I have been ambitious and have taken on the challenge of preparing two more grant proposal applications due by February 1st. Practice practice practice. 

I taught my first section of the spring semester today. With some experience behind me, I went ahead with more confidence and ease. Three sections of Introductory Biology (Organismal) for biology majors to teach in a week. That's around 55 students. Well, the pay check will be a little bit larger. s

Let's celebrate to one week of diligent exercise! Thank you, Dad, for the funds to attend fitness class for the semester. The joys of exercise had evaded me. It is difficult, sweaty, and pushes me to my muscular limit, but benefits do indeed follow. Furthermore, I have curbed my dessert and sweets intake and I have not made a dessert in almost two weeks. For this dessert connoisseur, it is quite an accomplishment. 

The weather has been beautifully mild and wonderful. I confess: Minnesota is miserably and brutally cold in January. Sunny skies with crisp mornings and warm afternoons, reminiscent of Minnesota in autumn.

I enjoyed a walk to the Supple Science Castle this morning. The castle happens to be on the complete opposite side of campus from where I live, as well as through a land of rolling hills. 

Oakleys on as I walk out of the door, down the stairs, and towards the campus. Pass the neighbor's orange tree. As I walked down the hill, I listened to the vocalizations of the ubiquitous feathered vertebrates. A lovely symphony composed of a myriad of voices and varieties. The chickadees are loud and chatter their name along with a suite of vocalizations. 

The Blue Jays make their presence known in the neighborhood. They squawk loudly. One squawks in flight while more garrulous jays' calls can be heard from all directions. 

Mocking birds and Great-tailed Grackles are also abundant. 

If you stop and watch the birds, you enter a world that our feathered kin inhabit around us. The grackles continue on communicating with one another by bill tilts, puffing their feathers, songs, and various other behaviors. To me, it's mildly amusing and brings about a slight calmness. 

They carry on with their avian ways, above and around their bipedal cousins.

What would it be like to live as a bird? One can only try to imagine, restricted by our world view based upon the lives of our nature as ground-dwelling, bipedal mammals.

But, at least we can appreciate the diversity of other sensory worlds that exist in parallel to ours.

2011- January is here again

Happy New Year! Today is also Martin Luther King Day. Here's to you MLK. 

It turns out that graduate school (sometimes) feels like an extension of undergraduate life. The spring semester commences tomorrow after a five week break. What did this graduate student do? Watched many hours of movies on AMC and adult cartoons, baked a plethora of holiday treats, and indulged in alcohol and desserts. 

My tree went back to it's cardboard home on January 2nd. Not bad. 

And then right after the New Year, I finally became (somewhat) motivated to write my grant proposal and thesis proposal. I finished the proposal four days before it was due. Good for me! And since I am teaching three lab sections this semester, as well as the start of my data collection, I have spent the whole weekend watching movies and football. I cleaned my apartment and I haven't slept until noon in almost two weeks. The semester is welcomed. 

Not a New Year's resolution, but a new-semester-new-routine-so-might-as-well-exercise reasoning. I did it once, I can do it again. Grains and legumes are stored in my cupboard. Fitness, yes!

My wonderful parents gave me a pair of nice binoculars for Christmas. Exciting (and probably sometimes boring) times ahead on my roadside surveys!

I had the opportunity a few weeks ago to accompany a fellow graduate student to three caves in central Texas. Two of the caves did not have bats, but we had to suit up with knee-high rubber boots and a helmet with a headlamp. The smell of guano is intense and smells of decaying organic matter, but it has a distinct smell among feces. When we went into the Old Tunnel, where there were a few thousand bats, we had to walk through knee high muck; it was guano mixed with water. One of the worst things that I have ever smelled. But, I live for these experiences. I found a bat skull in the first cave, along with a plethora of tiny wing bones. 

I'm equipped with new Nike sneakers. I'm ready for the spring 2011.

A Fish in the Crop

The best part of living 1200 miles south of my family and spending Christmas in the still green area of Central Texas? Receiving packages!! I love, love, love receiving mail, especially packages. Usually my mailbox is just full of junk. Two presents have come my way, including a pair of binoculars. Thank you very much, wonderful parents. Blake and I went to Aquarena Center yesterday, where Spring lake and the source of the San Marcos River is located, to test them out. We spotted a green heron stalking slowly in the water before gobbling down a fish. Dozens of turtles perched on logs in the lake to soak up the December sun. The turtles piled on top of one another. Some had a green symbiosis of some sort of photosynthetic organism on their shells. Through the lenses of the binoculars, I spotted pied-billed grebes, double-crested cormorants, black vultures, a song sparrow, a plethora of Carolina chickadees, Northern mocking birds, and a lone yellow-bellied sapsucker. What a wonderful and very much appreciated gift. Someday when I finished with my degrees, I will add "ornithologist" to my job description.

I have spent some time this past week to explore the eco-region that I now inhabit. Blake and I ventured Northwest of Austin to the Balcones Canyonlands National Wildlife Refuge. The day trip was just fantastic. We have never seen anything like it before. We were both in awe at the landscape. I was fascinated by the trees growing out of the rocky hillsides. Very little soil here; the limestone reigns on the Edward's Plateau. Blake enjoyed maneuvering his 1987 BMW through the steep and winding roads carved into the hillsides. We hiked 5 miles through the bluffs. Not too many organisms out since we went in the late morning through mid-day, but the scenery was worth the hike. I would like to go back in the spring to search for two endangered songbirds, the black-capped vireo and the golden-cheeked warbler.

What an opportunity! Living in a unique eco-region complete with endemic, rare, and endangered species! AND, I am studying birds for my Master's thesis! What a dream! Just think, I found this school on a search that had no direction, just the goal of finding somewhere, anywhere that would accept a graduate student with a not so great GRE score. I found exactly what I had been searching for; a program with talented and genuine students, wonderful faculty, a lovely landscape, and hills that tone my calves.

It still feels like dream. When do I wake up?

The winds of change

It's been a while. I apologize, but life has been busy for this graduate student lately. And the following was too important to write in just one day. It required a great amount of thought. 

The wedding.

I was lucky enough to spend a weekend in Minnesota and stand near the altar to witness my brother's nuptials.  Those four days were some of the best days of my life thus far. It was filled with reunions, laughter, happiness, and love. I cried many tears, mostly tears of joy. I cried when Nancy walked down the isle. I smiled the entire time. What an experience! Celebrating my brother's marriage with our families and friends! What an event! Full of love, joy, and beauty. 


I cannot recall a time when I felt so many positive emotions simultaneously. I don't think that I have ever been so happy. The bride and groom looked exquisite. Their faces beamed with joy. My face was glowing. Crystal, the photographer, posted the photos this week. She is truly talented. Emotions were captured perfectly. The joy, the laughter, the happy tears. I am privileged to have been there to share it with you. The colors were gorgeous; perfect for a snow-covered Minnesota autumn. The oranges, the reds. And Goldy the Golden Gopher in a tuxedo at the reception. Dad! What can I say? You are the best. 

Joshua, your speech was excellent. You had no reason to worry. You looked as handsome as ever. One of my favorite memories is you dancing, no vest or coat, just your orange tie and those suspenders. I love it. Diana, your speech was splendid. You are a very charming sister of Nancy, and I am glad to call you a friend.


Mom, you looked beautiful. Blake said to me (a few times), "Erin, your mom looks so good. Everyone looks great."


Ladies, you were gorgeous. The men were handsome, indeed. Nancy, you were breath-taking.
Well, at least I know I have a shot at looking good when I'm older.


My father made Nancy's engagement ring, which she accepted after a bike ride to a park near my mother's house. Joshua made the wedding bands.


I am grateful for the time I was given to spend with my family celebrating such a wonderful affair. I was lucky enough to reunite with my parents, my brothers, my grandparents, all other family members and some friends. It was brief, but what a magnificent opportunity life has provided me. 


Christian, over Independence Day at our family's cabin in 2008, you told me that you were going to propose to Nancy. I was incredibly happy for you. When I heard the news of your official engagement, I shed a few happy tears and was glowing. Ask Sehoya Cotner; I was at her house when I got the phone call from mom. 


Once, a wise person told me,  "at every celebration, there should be dancing."

Dancing there was. I danced for hours with my brothers, cousins, parents, friends, aunts, uncles. Shannon, now we have a song. Dancing with you will be with me for the rest of my days. I remember scenes with an incredible amount of detail. The song, the things I felt, the joy emitting from my preteen cousins dancing with us. 

Blake danced with me. He rarely dances but he held me close and danced with me. It was romantic and wonderful.

We were all there together. What a wonderful way to spend four days. I wish we had more time together, but I am glad for the time we had.

Leaving was extremely difficult. Minnesota is still the best place on Earth, to me. Home is where the heart the is.


A blizzard rolled into the Twin Cities last night with cold, windy might. It might sound crazy, but I miss it. I wish I was there. The last blizzard of this scale was Halloween of 91. Oddly, I wasn't there because I with my mom visiting my grandparents in Fort Worth, TX. 


For the first time here, I felt like an outsider. And I had an intense longing for Minnesota. 


I miss you. Everything about you, -25 F and two feet of snow. All or nothing. 


I have a sister-in-law, officially now. But to me Nancy, you have always been my sister and my family.


To Mr. and Mrs. Feichtinger, I wish you all the happiness and love in the world. Congratulations.

Sunset

6 more days until I arrive in Minneapolis, MN. My excitement is difficult to express in words. I cannot believe that Christian is getting married. It feels unreal. While talking to my dad tonight,

"Dad, can you believe that Christian is getting MARRIED next Saturday?"

"Isn't it somethin'?," he replied.

I have been dreaming about the upcoming event all week. Last night I had a dream that I forgot my bridesmaid shoes in TX. 

Am I even the same Erin that left Minnesota in July? In some ways. But I have changed a great deal. My whole life is changing at a rapid pace. My brother is getting married next week. Imaging the ceremony feels like a dream, not real. I am very happy for you. I am grateful that you asked me to be a bridesmaid and that I get to celebrate with you. 


"Home is not really a place, but more a place in your head," a friend told me today.


I certainly felt that way frequently as an older child and teenager. 


"You make your own home," he continued.


Indeed.

Reflections over black coffee

I recently had my feelings hurt, but my only choice is to just let it go. Sometimes it is difficult to just get over something, but I have found that in many cases, it is for the best. I stepped back and reminded myself that the bigger picture is more important. I asked myself, "will this matter in a month? In a year? In ten years?". Probably not. The offending action still hurts a little, but the upcoming event is too important for people that I care about that I just have to let it go. In the past, I would have held a grudge for a while. Months maybe. Life is too short. Oh, how far I have come.

"Blake, are you excited that are going to Minnesota in ELEVEN DAYS?!!?"


"Yea, but it is bittersweet."


"Well, I know it's only four days, but at least we are going!"

I wish we were staying longer, too. But, I will take four short days over no time at all. All this time that I have lived in Texas, I have known that a wedding in November would bring me back to the place I love. After this, uncertainty is the name of the game. I have no idea when I will make it back to Minnesota after next week.  The good news is that my mom and Auntie Cheryl are coming to visit in January. And hopefully my dad and Josh will come next spring...? (Hint, hint if you are reading!) 


My cousin Patrick will not be attending the upcoming nuptials. Lt Laine is Germany and will not be able to take leave from the Army. He will be missed. We wish you were coming, Lt Laine. I am serious when I say that I am coming to visit you next summer. I'll be at the Frankfurt airport next August. I'll be there. 





 

Time

It is difficult to focus. All I think about is going to Minnesota in just two weeks. I am looking forward to seeing my parents again. The reunion with those you miss after an extended period of time is a grand moment. 


The day I arrived in Minneapolis after four months in Hawaii was an unseasonably warm day in December. My phone had died and I was uncertain if Blake knew where to pick me up. I was frantic and near tears when I turned around and spotted him walking towards me smiling. It was surreal and wonderful. And it was like we were never apart. 


When I arrived at my mother's house, she came out of the front door at the sight of Blake's car in the driveway. She was smiling and it was like no time had passed. When I saw my dad, the same phenomenon occurred. It was as if no time had passed. I can't wait for those moments to happen again. 

I miss my parents. I miss my brothers. 

Two more weeks. An interruption to madness.